Three Places I Go to When I'm Feeling Blue
The Book Store
It’s about a 15-minute walk from home, which is an excuse for me to get out of the house, move my body, and remind other people that I exist!!! I’m real!!! And I’m sad!!!
When I get there, I take my time going through the 'new’ section. I always end up getting pulled in by the covers alone. When I’m satisfied, sort of pretending like I’m here to pick up a specific book, I head to the back to the Irish Lit section where one single chair lives. It faces away from one of the hallways and adds this extra element of coziness. It’s almost always empty, which is a curious thing to me because I feel like it’s waiting for me. I try not to question it too much (mostly due to a fear that I’ll somehow manifest someone else getting the same idea). With a select book in hand, I’ll sit and read for 20 minutes (enough time to look like you know what you’re doing + feel like you did something for the day).
The Japanese Market
I used to be super intimidated to go in. It’s almost always busy, and a bit cramped—horrible if you need something and quick but perfect if you’re in the market for nothing in particular, and everyone seems like they know what they’re doing and where they’re trying to go. So, scary for a newbie. But then, one day, I went in, and it wasn’t as scary as I thought. In fact, it felt like more of a comfort than anything else.
I like to go here when I’m feeling exceptionally low because I know I’ll always leave with a treat (salty, savory, or sometimes both). There are aisles and aisles of snacks and flavor combos you didn’t think were possible, painted bowls I always make a mental note to come back for when it’s someone’s birthday and warm onigiri that call my name.
The Park
This feels like an obvious spot, but it sort of feels intimidating on the really hard days—which is when I push myself to go. It may actually be the walk to the park that’s the most therapeutic part about this, but I haven’t fully looked into it yet. Getting back to the intimidating part— there’s almost always a million people at the park, and when I don’t feel my best, I sometimes have this weird fear that every person who’s seen me naked will also decide it’s a great day to go to the park. They’ll most likely be with their friend group, we’ll catch eyes, and I’ll feel sooooo weird for the rest of the day. When I push back this intimidation tactic, my mind makes up, I make my legs walk the 20 minutes, find a bench in the shade, pull out a book, and just hang. A few hours always pass by quicker than I can think, and before I know it I feel better.
