Advice on Reigniting Friendships, One Sleepover at a Time
FROM: ISO Friends
I've been feeling a growing distance in one of my long-term friendships. We used to be inseparable, sharing everything from inside jokes to life's ups and downs. Lately, though, it seems like we're on different paths, and our connection isn't as strong as it used to be. How do I navigate this shift in dynamics? I don't want to lose the friendship, but it's becoming increasingly challenging to bridge the gap. Any advice on how to address this and, if possible, rekindle the closeness we once had?
ES: Here’s what you’re gonna do: Have a sleepover. A true GIRL sleepover, I don’t care what gender you identify as. Nothing brings a group of friends together quite like watching chick flicks, making cootie catchers, and pizza delivery. Literally Mary Kate and Ashley pizza party night. Get the cheapest dollar store makeup and nail polish and sheet masks and do makeovers, braid each other’s hair, do temporary tattoos. Whatever rekindles your sense of whimsy the best.
Just look at the sleepover scenes in the movies and tv - The Princess Diaries 2, Gossip Girl season 1, 13 Going on 30 - sleepovers are always a major plot point, which are just what you need to rekindle a friendship. The iconic sleepover in Grease? Proof that even adults over 30 can have sleepovers and still act like they’re in high school.
Don’t worry about meticulously planning to make sure you have the perfect night. The messiest, most silly moments you have with your friends are always your most joyful.
Grease (1978)
If a sleepover still isn’t your cup of tea despite my very compelling case above - or maybe you just can’t nail down a time - I suggest trying to do little mundane things together. The whole point is to hang out just for the sake of hanging out and not relying too much on formal, structured activities that can make connection feel a bit difficult. Instead of saying “I can’t hang out, I have to run errands”, literally just invite your friend to go grocery shopping with you. I have friends who sometimes come over just to nap with me, and those memories are just as precious to me as a night of pounding pickleback shots.
