Advice on work, love, and rejection
FROM: A lost corporate girlie
I recently took on a new job (in the corporate space) that paid more than my last and is a step up career-wise for me. It’s been about 2 months and it’s never hit me harder than now that I don’t want to be pursuing this career path.
I know deep down that I actually want to work in film, but the pay isn’t great for someone just starting and the career change at this stage is so risky. I feel frozen. WHAT DO I DO?
ES:
You literally just have to decide if you care more about money or your passion. But if you can’t decide, I’ve hatched a fail-proof plan for you.
Here’s what you’re gonna do: save up a ton of money at your current job. Then, tell them that you’re going to hike the Appalachian Trail. I watched a documentary in high school about the Appalachian Trail and apparently a lot of people go on sabbatical from their jobs for 5-7 months to hike it.
Next, do not hike the Appalachian Trail (unless you feel so inclined). You’re actually going to be working in film. Note that you will need to block all your coworkers from viewing your Instagram story during this time. After seven months, you can decide if you feel film is still worth pursuing for you. If yes, keep working at it! If not, you’re going to find someone really good with Photoshop and get some pictures of you on a mountain or something so you can show them to your coworkers when you get back to your job.
Good luck!
FROM: Lots of moths, no flame
I recently started dating again after a really weird summer situationship that kind of dragged into fall. I knew it would never turn into anything serious, but didn’t really date much during the summer, so it sort of feels like I’m new to the dating world again. In the past, dating felt really fun and thrilling, but now it just feels like no one is sparking my flame. Like, no one. I want to get back in the game, but this past month has felt so lame. Should I wait for spring to start trying again?
ES:
NEVER wait to start trying again. Just take a little step back and don’t try intentionally (I know this might sound paradoxical but bear with me while I get to my point).
Delete your dating apps for a little while, and look around at the options you have in real life. Leave your number on a receipt for a hot bartender, bum a cigarette off someone just as an excuse to talk to them, or maybe even circle back with an old flame. Pay attention to who you have chemistry with! Once you know more about what you’re looking for, you’ll be able to date more intentionally in the future.
But if all else fails just charge your vibrator and take an edible.
FROM: Sensitive soul
I’ve been recently struggling with how sensitive I am, especially when it comes to rejection. I tend to take a lot of things personally, which I didn’t even truthfully realize until a friend pointed it out to me. I’m curious to know how you handle rejection, and if you have any tips for me!
ES:
“Handling” rejection for me typically looks like all the ways you’re literally not supposed to cope with adversity: drinking myself to sleep, deflecting the problem onto the other person, and finding a new romantic obsession.
Honestly, the healthiest way I’ve found to cope with rejection is simply distraction. Make plans with friends every night, take on new projects, and keep yourself so busy that you simply can’t dwell on it anymore because you have no time to dwell. And when you finally give yourself a break, you’ll be over it. Also, this past weekend a guy showed me a scar on his throat, told me that he just had cancer removed, and that he would go home with me but he was “scared” that his “throat” was going to “rip” “open”. IT’S NEVER PERSONAL!
Find more of Emma below:
Instagram: @itsemmaschmidt
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and we’ll give it our best shot.
